How to Heal After a Break-up

One day I received a phone call from my then loved one and found out that everything, “love is gone”, goodbye. For me it was a bolt from the blue, but as it turned out later, I was just hiding from the rain under my pink umbrella.

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Fortunately, it was 3 years ago, but I spent 2 invaluable years on an adequate assessment of what happened (signs he's sleeping with someone else). Now I can say with confidence: that there is life after a breakup, and it is even better than it was before.

Must be brave
First, you need to muster up the courage to accept this blow of fate. Love is an unearthly feeling that gives wings, you become better, more beautiful, smarter, and kinder. Unfortunately, these abilities are not innate, but come along with wonderful feelings for another person and leave with him.
You have to tell yourself that this is the end, no pause. After all, entertaining yourself with illusions is not the way to the beginning of a new life, but dancing on the grave of the old one. Have the courage to step into another dimension where you are alone. That's not fatal. Others have succeeded, and so can you. No one has died from separation yet, you are a full-fledged person and you can live on.

Love yourself more
Immediately after a breakup, it is difficult, almost impossible. But you need to understand that you need to put your interests above any others. This rule should protect against frequent use of the break initiator by the partner. “We are friends, my loved one is also having a hard time breaking up, I have to be strong and help him more” - forget it, this is nonsense. You have to get out of the abyss of despair after a breakup to help someone.

Listen to loved ones
From personal experience, I was convinced that no matter how unique, cosmic, “for life” your relationship is, loved ones perfectly understand what you need. Yes, none of those around you understand what kind of love you had, how your heart sank next to your beloved, but they don’t need it. Do not refuse advice under the pretext: “You don’t understand. We don't have what others have. No one has such a connection as between us. Friends and loved ones don't want to know what kind of relationship you had because it doesn't exist anymore. Why talk about something that doesn't exist?

No need to hold back emotions
At first, it will be a lake of tears (“Na-na-na-na, she left me, I see everything in the lakes of tears”). Later, you may radiate anger and resentment. It would be great at moments of emotional peak not to pick up easily broken objects, phones, or laptops. But if you knew where you would fall, you would put down the straw. It is not always possible to predict your state after parting, so you don’t have to worry about material losses, the main thing is to return to a normal state of mind. You are going through a kind of purification, so you don’t have to worry about the manifestation of emotions, even if you always keep everything under control.

The whole world is around, not in one person - get distracted
Watch a sad movie to repeat the 4th point. Watch a highly rated movie on IMDb, preferably with a twisted and unpredictable plot, so that the movie absorbs you for a while. Watch 500 Days of Summer, especially while listening to the words of Joseph Gordon-Levitt's character's sister. Watch Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind very carefully, because everyone trusts Jim Carrey, he wants you well. Looks like it's time to watch the movie "Her".

Breakups make you better
That which does not kill us, and so on. Not only will you become stronger and wiser by surviving a breakup. When you're dumped, you need to find some use for the energy and time your ex wasted. Courses, training, master classes, English, driver's licenses, Coursera and Prometheus - you need to take a chance. Turn the gap in your favor - prove that others did not notice such a superhero nearby.

Protect yourself from your ex

Open to new relationships

love the world